Greenoch History

In article shulick@cineret.ucs.indiana.edu (Sam Hulick) writes:
>Seriously.. what *IS* Greenoch?

Reposted without permission from my personal archives...

In response to the suggestion to repost, the following is a reposting of a couple of pieces concerning the Green Druid and the ancient combat style, Greenoch.

The art has been secretly handed down from master to student since the 12th century and although there has been no recorded activity of the Geenoch society in several hundred years, I can vouch for the authenticity of my teacher Master Field Marshall Jim Weiss, the first non celtic Greenoch master in history.

I believe Greenoch is very useful on the streets. If someone came up to me to mug me I would use Greenoch moves and then some Judo moves and then some more Greenoch moves. If there were two of them I would also use some Ninjutsu and TKD moves.

As far as sport goes, Greenoch is NOT a sport and I know if a TKD guy tries anything on a Greenoch guy or a Ninjutsu guy it would be over in a flash.

This is because these arts were used secretly for espionage in the middle ages and posess deadly knowledge. This enables the Greenoch or Ninjutsu practitioner to easily overpower any fighter of superior strength and atheletic ablility. Strategic psychological experience also matters little; its all in the moves you learn. The secret death blows and castle entry techniquies are especially potent.

Master Field Marshall Weiss must be able to trace his lineage back to the ancient Greenoch society, although I have never ask him. He teaches in L.A. now.

I was wondering if there are any Greenoch schools in the SF Bay area. I have been studying it for almost a year now and would hate to quit now. However, I would also like to try mixing Greenoch, Ninjutsu and either Aikido or TKD. Would this work?

Sincerely
The Green Druid

As he walks along the brightly lit Ginza district he suddenly has the urge to take a left into an alley way criss crossed above by electrical and telephone wires, and flanked by lighted signs of bars, song pubs and tiny eating establishments. Many of the signs are in English (as this is a sort of prestige thing in Japan) but he chooses to enter a bar which had Japanese characters on their sign because this would be a far more likely place to find a practitioner of Ninjutsu (or might I say a Ninjutsu-ka). He had seen a similar strategy in a sammurai movie once.

He sits alone for a while sizing up the clientele. They are mostly business men in suits, drinking and having a good time. The Green Druid is cautious, knowing, as always, he could be jumped at anytime.

After a while he is convinced that a gentleman at the far end of the bar, sitting alone, staring ahead with stoic resolve must be a martial artist. He is very mysterious looking. Possibly he is one of the ever elusive secret ninja or perhaps he wears a black gi.

The Green Druid approaches him and shows his familiarity and oneness with Asian cultures by bowing a real martial arts bow; his left open palm shielding his right fist. The man is somewhat surprised at this and looks up quizzically. "Konban wa", says the Green Druid to show that he is not just another foreigner, "I am looking for a good Ninja school ".

"What?" says the man. He speaks some English. The green Druid looks for secret looking tatoos on the man.

After quite a lengthy exchange, the man finally understands the word "Ninja". He laughs. "I don't know" he says as he turns away. "Kono hito wa hen desu". He says to the woman behind the bar, taking a drink from his glass of whiskey.

The Green Druid decides to look elsewhere for a Ninjitsu sensei. On the train he meets with mostly strange looks. "They must be scared to talk about the ninja", the Green Druid thinks. He finally finds someone who will speak with him. "The sammurai days are over", the man says, "it's just like your Europian knights and castles. Maybe you can try Karate. I took it in high school, it's a good sport."

"Nonsense", the Green Druid thinks. He exits the train at the Sengakuji station where he has read a very old and very famous Zen temple exists. Surely here they must have a Ninjutsu school. It is at this temple, he has read, that the remains of the "47 Ronin" were buried. He walks past some small tourist shops. At the temple, he sees a few tourists and sight seers. He pays a couple of hundred yen to walk through a small museum containing relics and clothing from the so called "47 Sammurai" historical event. He sees the graves of the 47 (or 48) sammurai, whisps of incense nestling moodily among the stones and bushes.

Finally, he sees a robed resident of the temple. The man is wearing glasses which lends a duality of periods to his ambiance against the robes and among the simple white and brown wood buildings of the temple. "Do you have a Ninja school here?", asks the Green Druid.

The man smiles shyly without really bothering to fully understand the question. "No, no..", he says shaking his head, as he walks away.

"I've studied the 21 jitsu arts", the Green Druid calls to him.

On the plane on the way back to California, the Green Druid reflects on how fortunate he is to have studied the ancient and secret Celtic martial art of Greenoch from Master Field Marshall Jim Weiss, the first non celtic Greenoch master in the world. Considering his failure at finding a real Ninja school in Japan, he resolves to mix Wing Chun and Aikido ( or maybe Aikijitsu ) with Greenoch. "That will be brutal on the streets", he thinks to himself. And he still might be able to mix some Ninjutsu in there as well. "I know there's one guy teaching it in L.A.. You can take anything there", he thinks. "Next year I'll go to Scotland and get in on a secret meeting of the Ancient Greenoch Society. Or maybe I'll go to Taipei and study something secret there for a few weeks" .

As he falls asleep he hears the words of Master Field Marshall Weiss :
"Remember, it's not in your strength or athletic ability. It's not in your strategic psychological fighting experience. It's not in understanding the physics of body mechanics. It's not in any kind of internal strength or higher level of concentration.

It's all down to what moves you know, and mine are ancient and secret."

Later he dreams of Karate Kid's Mr. Miyagi speaking to him while pruning a Bonsai tree. He hears "..perhaps the westerner studying martial art tend to over intellectualize, over verbalize, over idealize. This not Zen, Green-san...remember, you have what you have. Now practice.".

"Naa," he thinks, slightly aroused from his nap, "that wasn't even in the movie. Maybe some Muay Thai moves would be good too. And a Hapkido kick."

D
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pipkinsj@cpqhou.uucp (Jeff Pipkins ) writes:

> Try Greenoch instead -- it has all 50 humanly states, as well as the state
> of inebriation (from the drunken monkey style)!
> 

	"dlog si srettilg taht lla, erus s`ohw ydal a s`erehT
	nevaeh ot, yawraits eht gnibmilc s`ehs dna"

Then there are the paradoxical stories which challenge the rational, logical mind to transcend it's boundaries and realize the full potential of human consciousness. They are similar to, but vastly superior to the "koans" of Zen Buddhism.
A common "koan" is:
"How much wood could a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood?"

On the face of it, it seems absurd, even perhaps, childish, but prolonged meditation on this riddle causes a cessation of the thinking process (sometimes even the cessation of all other signs of life).

There are also the ancient hand gestures, such as "the bird" and "hang loose". They are used to induce emotional reactions in our opponents, and ultimately to control their minds. Using such techniques, I have been able to convince opponents to say things like:

	"These are not the droids we're looking for."
	"Move along!"

...unfortunately, I'm not at liberty to divulge it.

In fact, I can't even divulge the PENULTIMATE or ANTEPENULTIMATE spiritual exercise.

Unless of course, you send me a certified check for $50.00. Visa or Mastercharge accepted, no cash or COD's please. Allow 6 to 8 weeks for delivery.

"The Antepenultimate Spiritual Secret of Greenoch"
c/o Stephen "There's one born every minute" Chan
UCC 135
CMU
Schenley Park
Pittsburgh, PA 15213