Back to page 2
"It has spaceships, a bank heist, Interplanetary cannibal zombies, geishas, ruthless government operatives, and a hot psychic kung fu fighting chick, how could you possibly have been bored!" -- A fan's reaction to a non-fan's dislike ofSerenity.
"There are two kinds of scientific progress: the methodical experimentation and categorization which gradually extend the boundaries of knowledge, and the revolutionary leap of genius which redefines and transcends those boundaries. Acknowledging our debt to the former, we yearn nonetheless for the latter." -- Prokhor Zakharov, Alpha Centuri
"Neal Stephenson doesn't write endings for his trivia-packed geek adventure novels - he simply stops them, much like a road is stopped by a brick wall or a sheer cliff. The impact is similarly jarring for most readers." -- Kelly St.Clair
"It's kind of ironic that someone as solidly libertarian-right as Robert Heinlein probably produced more varied political thought experiments in his SF than any other major SF author, left or right." -- Eric O'Dell
"Progress isn't made by early risers. It's made by lazy men trying to find easier ways to do something." -- Robert Heinlein
"You know, most of the wars they've been fighting, lately, on the Europo-American Sector have been, at least in part, motivated by rivalry for oil fields." -- H. Beam Piper, "Temple Trouble," 1951
"A slide rule! Astrogating with a goddamned slide rule!" or words to that effect, from We All Died at Breakaway Station, by Richard C. Meredith (1969)
"Cybernetically-enhanced suicide agents do not snicker" -- Kenneth Lafarge
"Man has killed man from the beginning of time, and each new frontier has brought new ways and new places to die. Why should the future be different?" -- Corazon Santiago, Alpha Centuri
"Organic Superlube? Oh, it's great stuff, great stuff. You really have to keep an eye on it, though. It'll try and slide away from you the first chance it gets." -- Alpha Centuri
Trump Artists travel in Packs.
"You have one hundred and forty kilos of antimatter sitting around on my planet????"
"I thought it would come in handy,'" the doctor said lamely. -- (General Horner and Dr. Castanuelo, in Hell's Faire by John Ringo)
"Your weapons are no match for ours! People of Mars, surrender!"
"Um, this isn't Mars. This is Earth."
"Earth? Earth-with-nuclear-weapons Earth?"
"Yes."
[long pause] "Friend!" -- Unknown
"You can tell you're getting older. Your assistants are getting younger." -- Sarah Jane Smith to The Doctor (#10), "School Reunion"
"Just remember what old Jack Burton does when the earth quakes, the poison arrows fall from the sky, and the pillars of Heaven shake. Yeah, Jack Burton just looks that big old storm right in the eye and says, Give me your best shot. I can take it." -- Big Trouble in Little China
"I haven't been this excited about a team up since Star Trek formed a strategic alliance with Boobies" -- Brent Sienna, PVP Comic
I Read Baened Books
"INTJs don't have friends. They build them."
"That is so Welsh. I show you something fantastic - and you find fault." -- Captain Jack Harkness
"Now, I go to spread happiness to the rest of the station. It is a terrible responsibility but I have learned to live with it." -- Londo Molari, A Voice in the Wilderness, Part I
"Secrets are the very root of cool." -- Spook Country by Willam Gibson.
"First Rule of Aliens: Always assume they bite." -- Captain Jack Harkness.
"Heinlein isn't God; just His exec."
"Is there anything wrong with a woman preferring the dignity of an armed citizen? I don't like to be coddled and I don't like to be treated like a minor child. So I waive immunity and claim my right - I go armed." -- Longcourt Phyllis in Beyond This Horizon by Robert A. Heinlein
"If my doctor told me I had only six minutes to live, I wouldn't brood. I'd type a little faster." -- Isaac Asimov.
Mad Scientist (to his giant bat): "Ah, my friend! Our theory of glandular stimulation through electrical impulses was correct!" -- The Devil Bat
"There is no worse tyranny than to force a man to pay for what he does not want merely because you think it would be good for him." -- Robert Heinlein
"The future is here. It's just not widely distributed yet." -- William Gibson
"The world's looking more and more like Fallen Angels all the time." -- Glen Reynolds.
"You know what's a crime? That Led Zeppelin sounds different in this universe. It's just wrong." -- The Other Doctor
"...when you talk about damage radius, even atomic weapons pale before the that of an unfettered idiot in a position of power." -- Sam Starfall
"In a society of criminals, the innocent man goes to jail." -- Phillip K. Dick, Solar Lottery (1955)
"Sometimes a giant energy cannon is your best friend." -- Deck Gibson: Far Reach Commander!
"Some things can make a plumpish forty-year-old look good, but spandex and hula hoops are not two of those things." -- Andrew Borntreger, Review of Space Mutiny
"You don't have to burn books to destroy a culture. Just get people to stop reading them." -- Ray Bradbury
"You Told Me There Was No Underwear In Space!" - Carrie Fisher Roasting George Lucas
"History does not always repeat itself. Sometimes it just yells, "Can't you remember anything I told you?" and lets fly with a club." -- John W. Campbell
"Don't ask me why it was top secret, or even restricted; our government has gotten the habit of classifying anything as secret which the all-wise statesmen and bureaucrats decide we are not big enough girls and boys to know, a Mother-Knows-Best-Dear policy." The Puppet Masters, by Robert Heinlein
Kirk doesn't care if the lady is green, from the distant past, or has a strange shape-shifting ability that can makes her look like your Uncle Dave - Kirk is tappin' that ass.
"Space is disease and danger wrapped in darkness and silence." -- Leonard "Bones" McCoy
"[The Borg] are the most fearsome aliens in the galaxy, and look like the Tin Man on Goth Night at the local leather bar." -- John Scalzi
Jackson: "She's Hathor, the goddess of fertility, inebrity and music."
O'Neill: "Sex, drugs and rock and roll?" -- Stargate:SG1 - Hathor
"The next Star Trek series should be from the Klingon POV. Once Kirk died, they're the only ones having fun in the galaxy." -- Ed Driscoll
I made it to 2010 and all I got from the SciFi books of my youth was the lousy dystopian government.
"Forget diamonds or dogs -- a girl or boy's best friend is always a high-powered weapon." -- Athena Hera Sinistra, Darkship Thieves
Medicus est mortuus. Porro ago Medicus!
Why are there patterns drawn all over my body in blood, and whose blood?
"The reason the first three Star Wars movies were so terrific, and the second three sucked so bad, is actually very simple. The first three were about rebels, shooting guns and driving fast, and speaking with American accents. The second three were about politicians, discussing treaties and holding court, and speaking with British accents." -- Bill Whittle
"...the plot [of the Star Trek reboot movie] has a couple of holes you could drive a 24th century Borg-enhanced Giger-esque mining vessel through, but hasn't that always been the case?" -- Kelly St.Clair
"Y'know what the Talmud says? When someone's comin' to kill ya, get up early, kill 'em first." -- Artie Nelson, Warehouse 13
"I haven't been benign since 1956." - Artie Nelson, Warehouse 13
"Steampunk is what happens when Goths discover the color brown."
"How can anybody ever NOT need a gunship?" -- Sergeant Schlock, Schlock Mercenary, December 31, 2010
The life of a Browncoat is filled with pain and bitter remorse.
"Reach low orbit and you're halfway to anywhere in the solar system." -- Robert Anson Heinlein
Modifying Ohio-class subs for interstellar flight voids the warranty.
Please spay your Tribbles.
"Pirates loot ships. Space Vikings loot worlds. More Profit in it." -- Lucas Trask, Space Viking, Princess Valerie's War
"Your imaginary friend was a time traveling hipster sexgod?" -- Wendy Watson, Middleman in training
"In the Carpathians, they say this about werewolves: there's always a tree between you and it, but never a tree between it and you." -- Basher Moran, Professor Moriarty: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles
"May have been the losing side. Still not convinced it was the wrong one." - Captain Malcolm Reynolds
"There are three schools of magic. One: State a tautology, then ring the changes on its corollaries; that's philosophy. Two: Record many facts. Try to see a pattern. Then make a wrong guess at the next fact; that's science. Three: Awareness that you live in a malevolent universe controlled by Murphy's Law, sometimes offset in part by Brewster's Factor: that's engineering." -- The Number of the Beast by Robert A. Heinlein
"Darkness is a friend of mine...Sometimes I have to beat it back, or it would overwhelm me..." -- A Draka poet
"He had broken two of the gas balls under his feet just as he stopped to raise his hands. It was an old trick that had been working for thirty-five years." -- The Mad Goblin
"The trouble with an antimatter bullet is that the crew will use any excuse to get it off the ship." -- Louis Wu, Ringworld's Children
"Dying, hell. Damned if I'm going to do that until I'm fuckin' dead." -- A Draka soldier
"ille caelum fremitus" -- Those who roar to the sky
"Let me tell you about my Multipass!" -- Tagline for a Bladerunner/Fifth Element crossover
"If a vampire sparkles, he had better be on fire."
"This Universe never did make sense; I suspect that it was built on government contract." -- The Number of the Beast by Robert A. Heinlein
"If it looks like a duck and quacks like a duck, we have at least to consider the possibility that we have a small aquatic bird of the family anatidae on our hands." -- Douglas Adams
"Watching the Daleks and Cybermen trash talk each other, you'd swear they actually had testosterone." -- Michael Z. Williamson
"A Sergeant in motion outranks a Lieutenant who doesn't know what's going on." -- Schlock Mercenary
"An ordnance technician at a dead run outranks everybody." -- Schlock Mercenary
"I can't tell the future. I just work there." -- The Doctor, "The Bells of Saint John"
"I went home with a waitress, the way I always do,
How was I to know, she was with the Cylons too?" -- Leslie Bates
"Most people think that all it takes [to be a soldier] is two hands, two feet and stupid mind. Maybe so, for cannon fodder. Possibly that was all that Julius Caesar required. But a private soldier today is a specialist so highly skilled he would rank a master in any other trade." -- Robert Heinlein, Starship Troopers.
My plan is sheer elegance in its draconian complexity.
"Scalzi didn't win the Hugo for sucking off WSFS or SFWA -- he won it for sucking off the Trekheads." -- John Ringo
"I approve of a Robocop remake. Hopefully, they'll blow up more of Detroit." -- Michael Z. Williamson
"A Beautiful Companionship"
Of all the police
boxes in all time and space,
she walks into mine.
"When I don't understand, I have an unbearable itch to know why." -- Robert A. Heinlein
Siri does not grok Spock.
A redshirt and a Stormtrooper get into a firefight.
The Stormtrooper misses every shot.
The redshirt dies anyway.
"May the Force be with y'all!" -- Travis Taylor
Teyud looked at him with one thin brow arched. "For money, Faran sa-Yaji? The Thoughtful Grace do not sell themselves for a bowl of to'a. Sh'u Maz forbids." -- In the Courts of the Crimson Kings by S.M. Stirling, who is tipping his hat to Kwai Chang Caine
"I think the tall man of smoke who wears a wide hat shall bend above Nirriti's palace." -- Lord of Light by Roger Zelazny
"Because a world has need of your humility, your piety, your great teaching and your Machiavellian scheming." -- Lord of Light by Roger Zelazny
"Some of the most bloodthirsty people in Known Space are attending this convention. Female authors. Critics. Harlan. Both Heinleins." -- Robert A. Heinlein The Number of the Beast
"A univer$ity alway$ $tand$ $taunchly by it$ $olvent a$$ociate$; that'$ the ba$ic $ecret of $chola$tic $ucce$$." -- Robert A. Heinlein The Number of the Beast
"...the great thing is not to lose your nerve." -- Jerry Pournelle and S.M. Stirling Go Tell the Spartans
"In the Carpathians, they say this about werewolves: there's always a tree between you and it, but never a tree between it and you." -- Kim Newman Professor Moriarty: The Hound of the D'Urbervilles
"Some people insist that 'mediocre' is better than 'best.' They delight in clipping wings because they themselves can't fly. They despise brains because they have none." -- Robert A. Heinlein, Have Space Suit - Will Travel
"I may have been grown in a vat, but I wasn't decanted yesterday."
"If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate." -- Captain Zapp Brannigan, Futurama
"Godlike beings are often noted for some measure of nontraditional rationality. It just seems to go with the territory." -- Corwin of Amber, Blue Horse Dancing Mountains by Roger Zelazny
"Support Sad Puppies."
"Ewoks are just homeless Care Bears that sold their magic powers for drugs."
"There ain't no such thing as a free lunch, but the ones you pay for can taste damn good if they include cheeseburgers."
"Violence, naked force, has settled more issues in history than any other factor, and contrary opinion is wishful thinking at its worst." -- Starship Troopers by Robert Heinlein
"There is an American Empire, but there is no American Emperor." -- David Drake
"Nobody steals books but your friends." The Guns of Avalon, Roger Zelazny
"But hardcore Whedonites? They are to Trekkies what the Nation of Islam were to the Civil Rights Movement." -- Bobbie "Fatboy" Roberts, "5 Reasons It Sucks Being a Joss Whedon Fan"
"The Occilation Overthruster, the Flux Capacitor, and the Omega Thermocouple."
"She smiled. The others glanced our way as she appeared and she hit them all with that smile, like the Mona Lisa with a machine gun, turning slowly." -- Sign of the Unicorn, Roger Zelazny
"I'm a Jedi is the streets and a Sith in the sheets."
"I am a long-term optimist and short-term pessimist." -- Robert Heinlein
"Dumbledore's Army was a private militia of underage wizards illegally armed with military-grade spells."
"These are Heinlein’s Crazy Years - we just live in them."
"A paradox can be paradoctored." -- The Cat Who Walks Through Walls, Robert Heinlein
"Adventure is what happens when someone fucks up, pardon my French," -- The Sky People by SM Stirling
"People don't like tentacles." -- John Ringo
"The knowledge of the dead is lost to entropy."
"I swear before my God and these witnesses that I will stay true to the right and good, that my magic will be used to protect, not to enslave, that all my strength and wisdom must always shield the innocent. I swear to fight for liberty though it cost my life. The Society will be my blood and its knights my brothers, and that I will always heed the wisdom of the elders' council. I willingly pledge my magic, my knowledge, my resources, and my life to uphold these things." -- Oath of the Grimnoir Society, original date unknown
"If you expect to survive, you must keep your wits about you. You must keep your firearms clean, your knives sharp..." -- Warbound: Book Three of the Grimnoir Chronicles by Larry Correia
"If there was a Fey out there who wasn't insane or an asshole, I had not met them yet." -- Oliver Chadwick Gardenier, Monster Hunters: Saints by John Ringo and Larry Correia
"It was a tanned and forgettable mask. The eyes were vatgrown sea-green Nikon transplants." -- Neuromancer
"Jagdish was in charge of discipline. Which was good, since the majority of the descipline Ashok had handed out in his life involved executions, so he lacked the patience for such things." -- House of Assassins by Larry Correia
"A dying culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Lack of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot." -- Robert Heinlein
"I like libraries. It makes me feel comfortable and secure to have walls of words, beautiful and wise, all around me. I always feel better when I can see that there is something to hold back the shadows." -- Nine Princes in Amber by Roger Zelazny
"Failure is not an option - it is mandatory. The option is whether or not to let failure be the last thing you do." -- #70 in The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries
"Power armor can be a fursuit for people who are really into robots."
"Fantasy has trees. Science Fiction has rivits." -- Orson Scott Card
"Kathleen Kennedy has worked very hard to kill the Star Wars francise."
"After handcrafting and engraving rings for the elves, dwarves and men, Sauron probably would have had more success with an Etsy store than taking over the world."
"For many modern audiences, a 'Cowbody' is someone who 'Bebops' in a spaceship with a corgi." -- David Boop
"Next to the soul, the most beautiful object in the galaxy is a spaceship." -- SciFi illustrator Chris Foss
"Magical rotas sometimes strike me as instructions for lunatic scavenger hunts." -- A Night in the Lonesome October by Roger Zelazny
"Reading Zelazny is like dropping into a Mozart string quartet as played by Thelonious Monk." -- Greg Bear
"For all his knowledge, Beam was no dry intellectual. He was a storyteller; a man who could keep you up all night with his books and his tales. He had respect for the intellect and for intellectuals, but he was never one of the breed. He was a cavalier." -- Jerry Pournelle on H. Beam Piper
"A promise from a demon was about as trustworthy as gas station sushi." -- Owen Z. Pitt, Monster Hunter Bloodlines by Larry Correia
"I'd once gotten my ass kicked for not realizing how offensive garden gnomes were to real gnomes. Hunters had to be culturally sensitive like that." -- Owen Z. Pitt, Monster Hunter Bloodlines by Larry Correia
"Oh, my people had many gods. There was Conformity, and Authority, and Expense Account, and Opinion. And there was Status, whose symbols were many, and who rode in the great chariot Cadillac, which was almost a god itself. And there was Atom-bomb, the dread destroyer, who would some day come to end the world. None were very good gods, and I worshiped none of them." -- Calvin Morrison, Lord Kalvan of Otherwhen by H. Beam Piper
"Evil looms. Cowboy up. Kill it. Get paid." -- MHI Mission Statement
"The Godfather, A Place in the Sun, Dodsworth, Galaxy Quest - these are perfect films." -- David Mamet
"I threw back my head and howled. Sometimes it's the best thing to do." -- Snuff, A Night in the Lonesome October by Roger Zelazny
"Pretty sure the '7 of 9 sex costume' was mentioned by Jeri Ryan in her divorce."
On to page 4Main Sig Quote